~"Piece of cake!"
		--G. S. Koblas~
~"So so" is good, very good, very excellent good: and yet it is not; it
is but so so.  --William Shakespeare  "As You Like It"~
~'Zounds!  I was never so bethumped with words since I first called
my brother's father dad.  --William Shakespeare  "Kind John"~
~.sekatsim ekam tonnac retupmoc sihT~
~11-PDP eht edisni deppart ma I !pleH~
~2 no trump~
~4 out of 5 doctors surveyed recommend Preparation H for
temporary relieve of mild hemorrhoidal itch.~
~90% of everything is crud.~
~A Roman divorced from his wife, being highly blamed by his friends,
who demanded, "Was she not chaste?  Was she not fair?  Was she not
fruitful?" holding out his shoe, asked them whether it was not new
and well made.  "Yet", added he, "none of you can tell where it
pinches me".  --Plutarch~
~A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.~
~A boy gets to be a man when a man is needed.  --John Steinbeck~
~A company is known by the men it keeps.~
~A dead man cannot bite.  --Gnaeus Pompeius (Pompey)~
~A fair exterior is a silent recommendation.  --Publilius Syrus~
~A fool and his honey are soon parted.~
~A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.~
~A gift of flour will soon be made to you.~
~A good reputation is more valuable than money.  --Publilius Syrus~
~A guy has to get fresh once in a while so the girl doesn't lose her
confidence.~
~A horse!  A horse!  My kingdom for a horse!
		--William Shakespeare  "Henry VI"~
~A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.  --Lao Tsu~
~A king's castle is his home.~
~A kiss is a course of procedure, cunningly devised, for the mutual
stoppage of speech at a moment when words are superfluous.~
~A lie in time saves nine.~
~A light wife doth make a heavy husband.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Merchant of Venice"~
~A likely impossibility is always preferable to an unconvincing
possibility.  --Aristotle~
~A lost ounce of gold may be found, a lost moment of time never.~
~A man may sometimes be forgiven the kiss to which he is not entitled,
but never the kiss he has not the initiative to claim.~
~A man may well bring a horse to the water, but he cannot make
him drink with he will.  --John Heywood~
~A man who turns green has eschewed protein.~
~A man without a God is like a fish without a bicycle.~
~A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small package.~
~A man's house is his castle.  --Sir Edward Coke~
~A pipe gives a wise man time to think and a fool something
to stick in his mouth.~
~A plucked goose doesn't lay golden eggs.~
~A private sin is not so prejudicial in the world as a public
indecency.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~A relationship is like a shark - it has to keep moving forward
or it dies.  --Woody Allen~
~A rolling stone gathers no moss.  --Publilius Syrus~
~A snake lurks in the grass.  --Publius Vergilius Maro (Virgil)~
~A stitch in time saves nine.~
~A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.~
~A violent man will die a violent death.  --Lao Tsu~
~A vivid and creative mind characterizes you.~
~A wise man can see more from a mountain top than a fool can from the
bottom of a well.~
~A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from
a mountain top.~
~A wise person makes his own decisions, a weak one obeys public
opinion.  --Chinese proverb~
~A woman takes off her claim to respect along with her garments.
		--Herodotus~
~A word to the wise is enough.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~ACTION'S LAW:  Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts
absolutely.~
~ALBRECHT'S LAW:  Social innovations tend to the level of
minimum tolerable well-being.~
~ALLEN'S AXIOM:  When all else fails, read the instructions.~
~Absence makes the heart grow fonder.  --Sextus Propertius~
~Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.~
~Advice is a dangerous gift; be cautious about giving and receiving it.~
~Ahah!~
~Ahead warp factor one, Mr. Sulu.~
~Alas, how love can trifle with itself!
		--William Shakespeare  "The Two Gentlemen of Verona"~
~Alimony and bribes will engage a large share of your wealth.~
~All art is but imitation of nature.  --Lucius Annaeus Seneca~
~All his life he has looked away... to the horizon, to the sky, to the
future.  Never his mind on where he was, on what he was doing.  --Yoda~
~All hope abandon, ye who enter here!  --Dante Alighieri~
~All is well that ends well.  --John Heywood~
~All men know the utility of useful things; but they do not know
the utility of futility.  --Chuang-tzu~
~All the troubles you have will pass away very quickly.~
~All true wisdom is found on t-shirts.~
~Always do right.  This will gratify some people and astonish
the rest.  --Mark Twain~
~Always the dullness of the fool is the whetstone of the wits.
		--William Shakespeare  "As You Like It"~
~An atom-blaster is a good weapon, but it can point both ways.~
~An honest tale speeds best being plainly told.
		--William Shakespeare  "Henry VI"~
~An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.~
~An ounce of application is worth a ton of abstraction.~
~And tomorrow will be like today, only more so.  --Isaiah 56:12 (NSV)~
~Another such victory over the Romans, and we are undone.  --Pyrrhus~
~Any clod can have the facts, but having opinions is an art.
		--Charles McCabe~
~Any excuse will serve a tyrant.  --Aesop~
~Any man who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad.
		--Leo Rosten, on W. C. Fields~
~Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable
from magic.  --Clarke~
~Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.  --Publilius Syrus~
~Anything is possible, unless it's not.~
~Appearances often are deceiving.  --Aesop~
~As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.~
~As crazy as hauling timber into the woods.
		--Quintus Horatius Flaccus  (Horace)~
~As well look for a needle in a bottle of hay.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~At times discretion should be thrown aside, and with the foolish
we should play the fool.  --Menander~
~Avec!~
~Avert misunderstanding by calm, poise, and balance.~
~BOWIE'S THEOREM:  If an experiment works, you must be
using the wrong equipment.~
~Bachelor: a guy who is footloose and fiancee-free.~
~Bad men live that they may eat and drink, whereas good men eat
and drink that they may live.  --Socrates~
~Be both a speaker of words and a doer of deeds.  --Homer~
~Be cautious in your daily affairs.~
~Be cheerful while you are alive.  --Ptahhotpe (24th Century B.C.)~
~Be it our wealth, our jobs, or even our homes; nothing is safe while
the legislature is in session.~
~Be self-reliant and your success is assured.~
~Be valiant, but not too venturous.  Let thy attire be comely,
but not costly.  --John Lyly~
~Beam me up, Scotty!~
~Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone.~
~Beauty seldom recommends one woman to another.~
~Because the wine remembers.~
~Bedfellows make strange politicians.~
~Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which
you need more.  --Addison H. Hallock~
~Beggars should be no choosers.  --John Heywood~
~Behind every argument is someone's ignorance.~
~Ben, why didn't you tell me?  --Luke Skywalker~
~Better late than never.  --Titus Livius (Livy)~
~Better to use medicines at the outset than at the last moment.~
~Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
		--Mae West~
~Beware of Bigfoot!~
~Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes.  --Thoreau~
~Beware of friends who are false and deceitful.~
~Beware of geeks bearing graft.~
~Beware of the man who knows the answer before he understands
the question.~
~Big book, big bore.  --Callimachus~
~Bigamy is having one spouse too many.  Monogamy is the same.~
~Biz is better.~
~Boren's laws:
  1) When in doubt, mumble.
  2) When in trouble, delegate.
  3) When in charge, ponder.~
~Bureaucrat: a politician who has tenure.~
~But Captain -- the engines can't take this much longer!~
~But it does move!  --Galileo Galilei~
~But you shall not escape my iambics.  --Gaius Valerius Catullus~
~But, for my own part, it was Greek to me.
		--William Shakespeare  "Julius Caesar"~
~By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.~
~By nature, men are nearly alike; by practice, they get to be
wide apart.  --Confucius~
~By protracting life, we do not deduct one jot from the duration
of death.  --Titus Lucretius Carus~
~By the yard, life is hard.
By the inch, it's a cinch.~
~CARLSON'S CONSOLATION:  Nothing is ever a complete failure;
it can always serve as a bad example.~
~CChheecckk yyoouurr dduupplleexx sswwiittcchh..~
~CLARKE'S THIRD LAW:  Any sufficiently advanced technology is
indistinguishable from magic.~
~COHN'S LAW:  The more time you spend in reporting on what you are doing,
the less time you have to do anything.  Stability is achieved when you
spend all your time reporting on the nothing you are doing.~
~COLE'S LAW:  Thinly sliced cabbage.~
~CORRESPONDENCE COROLLARY: An experiment may be considered a success if no
more than half your data must be discarded to obtain correspondence with
your theory.~
~CROPP'S LAW:  The amount of work done varies inversly with the time
spent in the office.~
~CUTLER WEBSTER'S LAW:  There are two sides to every argument,
unless a person is personally involved, in which case there is
only one.~
~Captain's Log, star date 21:34.5...~
~Charity begins at home.  --Publius Terentius Afer (Terence)~
~Charity begins at home.~
~Charm is a way of getting the answer "Yes" without having asked
any clear question.~
~Cheap things are of no value, valuable things are not cheap.~
~Chocolate Chip~
~Circumstances rule men; men do not rule circumstances.  --Herodotus~
~Civilization, as we know it, will end sometime this evening.
See SYSNOTE tomorrow for more information.~
~Commit the oldest sins the newest kind of ways.
		--William Shakespeare  "Henry IV"~
~Commoner's three laws of ecology:
  1) No action is without side-effects.
  2) Nothing ever goes away.
  3) There is no free lunch.~
~Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand
the situation.~
~Congradulations!  You are the one-millionth user to log into
our system.~
~Consider the little mouse, how sagacious an animal it is which
never entrusts its life to one hole only.  --Titus Maccius Plautus~
~Convention is the ruler of all.  --Pindar~
~Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of
genius.~
~Counting in binary is just like counting in decimal if
you are all thumbs.     --Glaser and Way~
~Counting in octal is just like counting in decimal if you don't
use your thumbs.        --Tom Lehrer~
~Courage is your greatest present need.~
~Creditors have much better memories than debtors.~
~Criticism comes easier than craftsmanship.  --Zeuxis~
~Crito, I owe a cock to Asclepius; will you remember to pay the
debt?  --Socrates' last words~
~Cure the disease and kill the patient.  --Francis Bacon~
~Curiousity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought her back.~
~DOW'S LAW:  In a hierarchical organization, the higher the level,
the greater the confusion.~
~Darth Vadar!  Only you would be so bold...  --Princess Leia Organa~
~Death has been proven to be 99% fatal in laboratory rats.~
~Deflector shields just came on, Captain.~
~Deja vu:
  French., already seen; unoriginal; trite.  Psychol., The illusion
  of having previously experienced something actually being encountered
  for the first time.  Psychol., The illusion of having previously
  experienced something actually being encountered for the first time.~
~Deprive a mirror of its silver and even the Czar won't see his face.~
~Digital circuits are made from analog parts.
		--Don Vonada~
~Disease can be cured; fate is incurable.  --Chinese proverb~
~Dishonor will not trouble me, once I am dead.  --Euripides~
~Do not clog intellect's sluices with knowledge of questionable uses.~
~Do not count your chickens before they are hatched.  --Aesop~
~Do you know Montana?~
~Doing gets it done.~
~Domestic happiness and faithful friends.~
~Don't I know you?~
~Don't be overly suspicious where it's not warranted.~
~Don't ever slam a door; you might want to go back.~
~Don't everyone thank me at once...  --Han Solo~
~Don't get yourself involved with persons or situations that can't bear
inspection.~
~Don't go around saying the world owes you a living.  The
world owes you nothing.  It was here first.  --Mark Twain~
~Don't make a big deal out of everything; just deal with everything.~
~Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.  --Scottish Proverb~
~Don't put too fine a point to your wit for fear it should get
blunted.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~Don't read everything you believe.~
~Don't sweat it - it's only ones and zeros.
		--P. Skelly~
~Don't vote - it only encourages them!~
~Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac, you can always take
something for it.~
~Double!~
~Draw your salary before spending it.~
~Drop that pickle!~
~During the voyage of life, remember to keep an eye out for a fair wind;
batten down during a storm; hail all passing ships; and fly your colours
proudly.~
~E Pluribus UNIX~
~Each of us bears his own Hell.  --Publius Vergilius Maro (Virgil)~
~Economics is extremely useful as a form of employment for
economists.  --John Kenneth Galbraith~
~Economy makes men independent.~
~Ed1na.~
~Elliptic paraboloids for sale.~
~Eloquence is logic on fire.~
~Envy is a pain of mind that successful men cause their neighbors.
		--Onasander~
~Established technology tends to persist in spite of
new technology.~
~Eureka!  --Archimedes~
~Even God lends a hand to honest boldness.  --Menander~
~Even a hawk is an eagle among crows.~
~Even if you persuade me, you won't persuade me.  --Aristophanes~
~Even moderation ought not to be practiced to excess.~
~Even the boldest zebra fears the hungry lion.~
~Even the smallest candle burns brighter in the dark.~
~Every cloud engenders not a storm.  --William Shakespeare  "Henry VI"~
~Every little picofarad has a nanohenry all its own.
		--Don Vonada~
~Every man has his price.
Every price has its man.~
~Every man is as Heaven made him, and sometimes a great deal
worse.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~Every purchase has its price.~
~Every why hath a wherefore.  --William Shakespeare  "A Comedy of Errors"~
~Everyone complains of his memory, no one of his judgment.~
~Everything bows to success, even grammar.~
~Everything you know is wrong.~
~Executive ability is prominent in your make-up.~
~Exercise caution in your daily affairs.~
~Expect a letter from a friend who will ask a favor of you.~
~Experience is what causes a person to make new mistakes
instead of old ones.~
~Extreme fear can neither fight nor fly.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Rape of Lucrece"~
~FINAGLE'S LAWS:
  (1) Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it makes it worse.
  (2) No matter what results are expected someone is always willing to
      fake it.
  (3) No matter what the result someone is always eager to misinterpret it.
  (4) No matter what occurs, someone believes it happened according to his
      pet theory.~
~Fain would I climb, yet fear I to fall.  --Sir Walter Ralegh~
~Faith goes out through the window when beauty comes in at the door.~
~Far duller than a serpent's tooth it is to spend a quiet youth.~
~Fast ship?  You mean you've never heard of the Millennium Falcon?
		--Han Solo~
~Fig Newton~
~First law of debate:
Never argue with a fool.  People might not know the difference.~
~Five rules for eternal misery:
  1) Always try to exhort others to look upon you favorably.
  2) Make lots of assumptions about situations and be sure to
     treat these assumptions as though they are reality.
  3) Then treat each new situation as though it's a crisis.
  4) Live in the past and future only (become obsessed with
     how much better things might have been or how much worse
     things might become).
  5) Occasionally stomp on yourself for being so stupid as to
     follow the first four rules.~
~For adult education nothing beats children.~
~For courage mounteth with occasion.  --William Shakespeare  "King John"~
~For fools rush in where angels fear to tread.~
~For men use, if they have an evil turn, to write it in marble:
and whoso doth us a good turn we write it in dust.  --Sir Thomas More~
~For people who like that kind of book, that is the kind of book they
will like.~
~For thee the wonder-working earth puts forth sweet flowers.
		--Titus Lucretius Carus~
~Force has no place where there is need of skill.  --Herodotus~
~Freedom is slavery.  Ignorance is strength.  War is peace.  --George Orwell~
~From listening comes wisdom and from speaking repentance.~
~Function reject.~
~GOVERNMENT'S LAW:  There is an exception to all laws.~
~GUMPERSON'S LAW:  The probability of a given event occuring is
inversely proportional to its desirability.~
~Ginger Snap~
~Give him an evasive answer.~
~Give me chastity and continence, but not just now.  --St. Augustine~
~Given my druthers, I'd druther not.~
~God gives us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends.~
~Good morning.  This is the telephone company.  Due to repairs, we're
giving you advance notice that your service will be cut off indefinitely
at ten o'clock.  That's two minutes from now.~
~Governor Tarkin.  I should have expected to find you holding Vadar's
leash.  I thought I recognized your foul stench when I was brought on
board.  --Princess Leia Organa~
~HARVARD LAW:  Under the most carefully controlled conditions of
pressure, temperature, humidity, and other variables, the system
will perform as it dame well pleases.~
~HUBBARD'S LAW:  Don't take life too seriously; you won't
get out of it alive.~
~Hailing frequencies open, Captain.~
~Happiness is just an illusion, filled with sadness and confusion.~
~Happy feast of the pig!~
~Harp not on that string.  --William Shakespeare  "Henry VI"~
~Haste maketh waste.  --John Heywood~
~Have at you!~
~Have no friends not equal to yourself.  --Confucius~
~Having nothing, nothing can he lose.  --William Shakespeare  "Henry VI"~
~Having the fewest wants, I am nearest to the gods.  --Socrates~
~He does it with a better grace, but I do it more natural.
		--William Shakespeare  "Twelfth-Night"~
~He draweth out the thread of his verbosity finer than the staple of
his argument.  --William Shakespeare  "Love's Labour's Lost"~
~He has not acquired a fortune; the fortune has acquired him.  --Bion~
~He hath eaten me out of house and home.  --William Shakespeare  "Henry IV"~
~He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.~
~He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap.~
~He that is giddy thinks the world turns round.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Taming of the Shrew"~
~He walks as if balancing the family tree on his nose.~
~He was so narrow-minded he could see through a keyhole with two eyes.~
~He who falls in love with himself will have no rivals.~
~He who foresees calamities suffers them twice over.~
~He who has a shady past knows that nice guys finish last.~
~He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.~
~He who hesitates is sometimes saved.~
~He who hoots with owls by night cannot soar with eagles by day.~
~He who invents adages for others to peruse takes along rowboat when
going on cruise.~
~He who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.~
~He who knows others is wise.  He who knows himself is
enlightened.  --Lao Tsu~
~He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.  --Lao Tsu~
~He who knows, does not speak.  He who speaks, does not know.  --Lao Tsu~
~He who laughs last probably doesn't understand the joke.~
~He who slings mud loses ground.  --Chinese Proverb~
~Hell's broken loose.  --Robert Greene~
~Hello.  Jim Rockford's machine, this is Larry Doheny's machine.  Will you
please have your master call my master at his convenience?  Thank you.
Thank you.  Thank you.~
~Help!  I'm trapped inside the PDP-11!~
~Here comes the orator, with his flood of words and his drop of reason.~
~Hey, Jim, it's me, Susie Lillis from the laundromat.  You said you were
gonna call and it's been two weeks.  What's wrong, you lose my number?~
~Hi Jimbo.  Dennis.  Really appreciate the help on the income tax.  You
wanna help on the audit now?~
~His life was formal; his actions seemed ruled with a ruler.~
~History books which contain no lies are extremely dull.~
~Honesty's the best policy.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~Honeymoon: a short period of doting between dating and debting.~
~Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper.  --Francis Bacon~
~Hope is a waking dream.  --Aristotle~
~Horner's five thumb postulate:
Experience varies directly with equipment ruined.~
~Hors d'oeuvres -- a ham sandwich cut into fourty pieces.  -Jack Benny~
~How apt the poor are to be proud.  --William Shakespeare  "Twelfth-Night"~
~How can you govern a nation which has 246 kinds
of cheese?  --Charles de Gaulle~
~How come we never talk anymore?~
~How many "coming men" has one known!  Where on earth do they all go to?~
~How sharper than a hound's tooth it is to have a thankless serpent.~
~How sharper than a serpent's tooth is a sister's "see?"
		--Linus, "Peanuts"~
~How you look depends on where you go.~
~I am NOMAD!~
~I am a man: nothing human is alien to me.  --Publius Terentius Afer (Terence)~
~I am looking for a honest man.  --Diogenes the Cynic~
~I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and
I love today.  --William Allen White~
~I belong to no organized party.  I am a Democrat.  --Will Rogers~
~I can relate to that.~
~I couldn't possibly fail to disagree with you less.~
~I despise the pleasure of pleasing people whom I despise.~
~I do desire we may be better strangers.
		--William Shakespeare  "As You Like It"~
~I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly,
or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.  --Chuang-tzu~
~I don't get no respect.~
~I don't remember ever having had the itch, and yet scratching is one of
nature's sweet pleasures, and so handy.~
~I don't understand you anymore.~
~I dote on his very absence.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Merchant of Venice"~
~I enjoy the time that we spend together.~
~I fear explanations explanatory of things explained.~
~I found Rome a city of bricks and left it a city of marble.
		--Augustus Caesar~
~I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.  --Mae West~
~I have a very strange feeling about this...  --Luke Skywalker~
~I have gained this by philosophy: that I do without being commanded
what others do only from fear of the law.  --Aristotle~
~I have hardly ever known a mathematician who was capable of
reasoning.  --Plato~
~I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
		--Mark Twain~
~I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.  --Publilius Syrus~
~I hear what you're saying but I just don't care.~
~I know on which side my bread is buttered.  --John Heywood~
~I know the disposition of women: when you will, they won't; when
you won't, they set their hearts upon you of their own inclination.
		--Publius Terentius Afer (Terence)~
~I know you think you thought you knew what you thought I said,
but I'm not sure you understood what you thought I meant.~
~I like myself, but I won't say I'm as handsome as the bull that
kidnapped Europa.  --Marcus Tullius Cicero~
~I love treason but hate a traitor.  --Gaius Julius Caesar~
~I love work; it fascinates me; I can sit and watch it for hours.~
~I must have slipped a disk -- my pack hurts.~
~I never did it that way before.~
~I never fail to convice an audience that the best thing they could do
was to go away.~
~I saw what you did and I know who you are.~
~I suggest a new stategy, Artoo: let the Wookiee win.  --See Threepio~
~I think we're in trouble.  --Han Solo~
~I think, therefore I am... I think.~
~I will follow the good side right to the fire, but not into it
if I can help it.  --Michel Eyquem de Montaigne~
~I will make you shorter by the head.  --Elizabeth I~
~I will not forget you.~
~I would much rather have men ask why I have no statue, than why I
have one.  --Marcus Procius Cato~
~I'd just as soon kiss a Wookiee.  --Princess Leia Organa~
~I'll burn my books.  --Christopher Marlowe~
~I'll never get off this planet.  --Luke Skywalker~
~I'll turn over a new leaf.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~I've been there.~
~I've given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.~
~I've got a very bad feeling about this...  --Han Solo~
~I've looked at the listing, and it's right!  --Joel Halpern.~
~I've never been hurt by anything I didn't say.  --Calvin Coolidge~
~I've only got 12 cards.~
~Idleness is the holiday of fools.~
~Idleness: leisure gone to seed.~
~If I cannot bend Heaven, I shall move Hell.
		--Publius Vergilius Maro (Virgil)~
~If I have not seen so far it is because I stood in giant's
footsteps.~
~If I knew what brand [of whiskey] he drinks, I would send a barrel or
so to my other generals.  --Abraham Lincoln, on General Grant~
~If Karl, instead of writing a lot about Capital, had made a lot of
Capital, it would have been much better.  --Karl Marx's Mother~
~If at first you don't succeed, you're doing about average.~
~If everything on the road of life seems to be coming your way,
you are on the wrong side of the road.~
~If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something.~
~If happiness is in your destiny, you need not be in a hurry.
		--Chinese proverb~
~If it isn't broken, don't fix it.~
~If it wasn't so cool out today, it would be warmer.~
~If it wasn't so warm out today, it would be cooler.~
~If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.~
~If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on
vacation.~
~If there is no wind, row.  --Polish proverb~
~If this is timesharing, give me my share right now.
It's not time yet.~
~If two men agree on everything, you may be sure that one of them
is doing the thinking.  --LBJ~
~If you always postpone pleasure you will never have it.  Quit work and
play for once.~
~If you always postpone pleasure you will never have it.
Quit work and play for once.~
~If you continually give you will continually have.~
~If you didn't get caught, did you really do it?~
~If you explain something so clearly that no one can possibly
misunderstand, someone will.~
~If you fool around with something long enough, it will eventually
break.~
~If you lose your temper at a newspaper columnist, he'll get
rich or famous or both.~
~If you make a mistake you right it immediately to the best of your
ability.~
~If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; but if you
really make them think they'll hate you.~
~If you put it off long enough, it might go away.~
~If you refuse to accept anything but the best you very often get it.~
~If you suspect a man, don't employ him.~
~If you treat people right they will treat you right --
90% of the time.  --FDR~
~If you try to please everyone, somebody is not going to like it.~
~If you wish to succeed, consult three old people.~
~If you would keep a secret from an enemy, tell it not to a friend.~
~If your aim in life is nothing; you can't miss.~
~If your bread is stale, make toast.~
~In America, any boy may become president and I suppose that's just
one of the risks he takes.  --Adlai Stevenson~
~In charity there is no excess.  --Francis Bacon~
~In dwelling, be close to the land.
In meditation, delve deep into the heart.
In dealing with others, be gentle and kind.
In speech, be true.
In work, be competent.
In action, be careful of your timing.  --Lao Tsu~
~In most instances, all an argument proves is that two people
are present.~
~In my end is my beginning.  --Mary Stuart [Queen of Scots]~
~In the stairway of life, you'd best take the elevator.~
~In this world some people are going to like me and some are not.
So, I may as well be me.  Then I know if someone likes me, they
like me.~
~Indomitable in retreat;
invincible in advance;
insufferable in victory.
		--Winston Churchill, on General Montgomery~
~Information is the inverse of entropy.~
~Is knowledge knowable; and how do we know?~
~It [marriage] happens as with cages: the birds without despair
to get in, and those within despair of getting out.
		--Michel Eyquem de Montaigne~
~It is Fortune, not Wisdom that rules man's life.~
~It is a hard matter, my fellow citizens, to argue with the belly,
since it has no ears.  --Marcus Porcius Cato~
~It is a poor judge who cannot award a prize.~
~It is a wise father that knows his own child.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Merchant of Venice"~
~It is annoying to be honest to no purpose.  --Publius Ovidius Naso (Ovid)~
~It is better to wear out than to rust out.~
~It is convenient that there be gods, and, as it is convenient, let
us believe there are.  --Publius Ovidius Naso (Ovid)~
~It is difficult to soar with eagles when you work with turkeys.~
~It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.
		--Leonardo da Vinci~
~It is easier to run down a hill than up one.~
~It is far better to be deceived than to be undeceived by those we love.~
~It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of
work to do.~
~It is indeed desirable to be well descended, but the glory belongs
to our ancestors.  --Plutarch~
~It is much harder to find a job than to keep one.~
~It is not every question that deserves an answer.  --Publilius Syrus~
~It is now pitch dark.  If you proceed, you will likely fall into a pit.~
~It is sweet to let the mind unbend on occasion.
		--Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~It is the nature of extreme self-lovers, as they will set an house
on fire, and it were but to roast their eggs.  --Francis Bacon~
~It is the wise bird who builds his nest in a tree.~
~It is when I struggle to be brief that I become obscure.
		--Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~It is your concern when your neighbor's wall is on fire.
		--Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~It looks like it's up to me to save our skins.  Get into that
garbage chute, flyboy!  --Princess Leia Organa~
~It now costs more to amuse a child than it once did to
educate his father.~
~It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.~
~It seems like the less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the
flag.~
~It takes both a weapon, and two people, to commit a murder.~
~It was a book to kill time for those who liked it better dead.~
~It'll be just like Beggars Canyon back home.  --Luke Skywalker~
~It's a poor workman who blames his tools.~
~It's clever, but is it art?~
~It's later than you think, the joint Russian-American space mission has
already begun.~
~It's not reality that's important, but how you perceive things.~
~It's sweet to be remembered, but it's often cheaper to be forgotten.~
~JENKINSON'S LAW:  It won't work.~
~Jim, it's Grace at the bank.  I checked your Christmas Club account.
You don't have five-hundred dollars.  You have fifty.  Sorry, computer
foul-up!~
~Jim, it's Jack.  I'm at the airport.  I'm going to Tokyo and wanna pay
you the five-hundred I owe you.  Catch you next year when I get back!~
~Jim, it's Maria over at the laundromat.  There's a yellow dress in with your
things.  Is that a mistake, or special handling, or what?~
~Jim, this is Janelle.  I'm flying tonight, so I can't make our date, and
I gotta find a safe place for Daffy.  He loves you, Jim!  It's only two
days, and you'll see.  Great Danes are no problem!~
~Jim, this is Matty down at Ralph's and Mark's.  Some guy named Angel
Martin just ran up a fifty buck bar tab.  And now he wants to charge it
to you.  You gonna pay it?~
~Just to have it is enough.~
~Kirk to Enterprise...~
~Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o'Sunday.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Taming of the Shrew"~
~Knowledge is power.  --Francis Bacon~
~Knowledge is power.~
~Knowledge without common sense is folly.~
~LARKINSON'S LAW:  All laws are basically false.~
~LAW OF CONTINUITY:  Experiments should be reproducible.  They should
all fail the same way.~
~LAW OF THE TOO SOLID GOOF:  In any collection of data, the figures
that are obviously correct beyond all need of checking, contain the errors.
  Corollary 1:  No one you ask for help will see the error either.
  Corollary 2:  Any nagging intruder, who stops by with unsought advice
                will spot it immediately.~
~Laugh when you can; cry when you must.~
~Law stands mute in the midst of arms.  --Marcus Tullius Cicero~
~Lawrence Radiation Laboratory keeps all its data in an old gray trunk.~
~Lead on, MacDuff!  --Shakespeare~
~Learn to pause -- or nothing worthwhile can catch up to you.~
~Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning
is perilous.  --Confucius~
~Leave no stone unturned.  --Euripides~
~Lend money to a bad debtor and he will hate you.~
~Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.  --Publilius Syrus~
~Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.~
~Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.~
~Let me take you a button-hole lower.
		--William Shakespeare  "Love's Labour's Lost"~
~Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.~
~Let's just be friends and make no special effort to ever see each other
again.~
~Life is like an onion: you peel off layer after layer, then you find
there is nothing in it.~
~Life is one long struggle in the dark.  --Titus Lucretius Carus~
~Life is to you a dashing and bold adventure.~
~Life: that brief interlude between nothingness and eternity.~
~Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone.~
~Lonely is a man without love.~
~Lonely men seek companionship.  Lonely women sit at home and wait.
They never meet.~
~Lonely men seek companionship. Lonely women sit at home and wait.
They never meet.~
~Look afar and see the end from the beginning.~
~Look ere ye leap.  --John Heywood~
~Lord, what fools these mortals be!
		--William Shakespeare  "A Midsummer-Night's Dream"~
~Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea.~
~Love conquers all things; let us too surrender to love.
		--Publius Vergilius Maro (Virgil)~
~Love is sentimental measles.~
~Love the sea?  I dote upon it -- from the beach.~
~Love the sea? I dote upon it -- from the beach.~
~MAY'S LAW:  The quality of correlation is inversly proportional
to the density of control.  (The fewer the data points,
the smoother the curves.)~
~MENCKEN'S LAW:  There is always an easy answer to every human
problem -- neat, plausible and wrong.~
~MURPHY'S LAWS:
  (1) If anything can go wrong, it will.
  (2) Nothing is as easy as it looks.
  (3) Everything takes longer than you think it will.~
~Make a wish, it might come true.~
~Man and wife make one fool.~
~Man is by nature a political animal.  --Aristotle~
~Man will never fly.
Space travel is merely a dream.
All aspirin is alike.~
~Man's horizons are bounded by his vision.~
~Many a family tree needs trimming.~
~Many changes of mind and mood; do not hesitate too long.~
~Many hands make light work.  --John Heywood~
~Many pages make a thick book, except for pocket bibles which are on very
very thin paper.~
~Many pages make a thick book, except for pocket bibles which
are on very thin paper.~
~Many people are unenthusiastic about their work~
~Many people are unenthusiastic about your work~
~Many receive advice, few profit by it.  --Publilius Syrus~
~Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.  --Voltaire~
~Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on earth.  --John Lyly~
~Massachusetts has the best politicians money can buy.~
~Mater artium necessitas [Necessity is the mother of invention].~
~Mathematicians practice absolute freedom.
		--Henry Adams~
~Matrimony is the root of all evil.~
~May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits.~
~May you live in uninteresting times.  --Chinese proverb~
~Maybe Computer Science should be in the College of Theology.
		--R.S. Barton~
~Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them
pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing had happened.
		--Winston Churchill~
~Men seldom show dimples to girls who have pimples.~
~Might as well be frank, Monsieur.  It would take a miracle to get
you out of Casablanca.~
~Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate.~
~Misery no longer loves company, nowadays it insists on it.~
~Misster, do you vant to buy a duck.~
~Mistakes are oft the stepping stones to failure.~
~Moderation in all things.  --Publius Terentius Afer (Terence)~
~Money cannot buy love, nor even friendship.~
~Money may buy friendship but money cannot buy love.~
~Money will say more in one moment than the most eloquent lover can in
years.~
~Mos Eisley Spaceport; you'll not find a more wretched collection of
villainy and disreputable types...  --Obi-wan Kenobi~
~Most people are unenthusiastic about their work.~
~Mr. Rockford, this is the Thomas Crown School of Dance and Contemporary
Etiquette.  We aren't going to call again!  Now you want these free
lessons or what?~
~Mr. Rockford; Miss Collins from the Bureau of Licenses.  We got your
renewal before the extended deadline but not your check.  I'm sorry but
at midnight you're no longer licensed as an investigator.~
~Mr. Rockford?  This is Betty Joe Withers.  I got four shirts of yours from
the Bo Peep Cleaners by mistake.  I don't know why they gave me men's
shirts but they're going back.~
~Mr. Rockford?  You don't know me, but I'd like to hire you.  Could
you call me at...  My name is... uh...  Never mind, forget it!~
~Mum's the word.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~Music in the soul can be heard by the universe.  --Lao Tsu~
~Must I hold a candle to my shames?
		--William Shakespeare  "The Merchant of Venice"~
~My cup hath runneth'd over with love.~
~My family history begins with me, but yours ends with you.  --Iphicrates~
~My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my
life there.~
~My only love sprung from my only hate!
Too early seen unknown, and known too late!
		--William Shakespeare  "Romeo and Juliet"~
~Nature, to be commanded, must be obeyed.  --Francis Bacon~
~Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a
man's character, give him power.  --Abraham Lincoln~
~Necessity has no law.  --St. Augustine~
~Neither spread the germs of gossip nor encourage others to do so.~
~Nemo me impune lacessit [No one provokes me with impunity]
		--Motto of the Crown of Scotland~
~Never argue with a woman when she's tired -- or rested.~
~Never call a man a fool; borrow from him.~
~Never do today what you can put off until tomorrow.~
~Never drink from your finger bowl -- it contains only water.~
~Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.~
~Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.~
~Never promise more than you can perform.  --Publilius Syrus~
~Never say you know a man until you have divided an inheritance with
him.~
~Never use 'etc.' - it makes people think there is more where there
is not or that there is not space to list it all, etc.~
~Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is really quite as
satisfying as an income tax refund.  --F. J. Raymond~
~Nice guys get sick.~
~No doubt Jack the Ripper excused himself on the grounds that it was
human nature.~
~No guest is so welcome in a friend's house that he will not become
a nuisance after three days.  --Titus Maccius Plautus~
~No one becomes depraved in a moment.  --Decimus Junius Juvenalis~
~No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.~
~No one can put you down without your full cooperation.~
~No one knows what he can do till he tries.  --Publilius Syrus~
~No one regards what is before his feet; we all gaze at the stars.
		--Quintus Ennius~
~No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it.
		--C. Schulz~
~No problem is so large it can't be fit in somewhere.~
~No sooner said than done--so acts your man of worth.  --Quintus Ennius~
~Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.~
~Nobody ever ruined their eyesight by looking at the bright side
of something.~
~Not all who own a harp are harpers.  --Marcus Terentius Varro~
~Nothing endures but change.  --Heraclitus~
~Nothing is but what is not.~
~Nothing is finished until the paperwork is done.~
~Nothing is so firmly believed as which is least known.
		--Michel Eyquem de Montaigne~
~Nothing will ever be attempted if all possible objections must be first
overcome.		--Dr. Johnson~
~Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.~
~Now is the time for drinking; now the time to beat the earth with
unfettered foot.  --Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~O imitators, you slavish herd!  --Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~Oatmeal raisin~
~Of all forms of caution, caution in love is the most fatal.~
~Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable.  --Plato~
~Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts - for support
rather than illumination.~
~Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts --
for support rather than illumination.~
~Oh this age!  How tasteless and ill-bred it is.  --Gaius Valerius Catullus~
~Oh wearisome condition of humanity!  Born under one law, to
another bound.  --Fulke Greville, Lord Brooke~
~Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to
deceive.  --Shakespeare~
~Old age is the harbor of all ills.  --Bion~
~Old men are fond of giving good advice to console themselves for their
inability to give bad examples.~
~Old programmers never die, they just hit account block limit.~
~On a clear disk you can seek forever.
		--J. Mischkinsky~
~Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.
		--Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~Once harm has been done, even a fool understands it.  --Homer~
~One family builds a wall, two families enjoy it.~
~One good turn asketh another.  --John Heywood~
~One good turn deserves another.  --Gaius Petronius~
~One man tells a falsehood, a hundred repeat it as true.~
~One picture is worth more than ten thousand words.  --Chinese proverb~
~Only a fool has no doubts.~
~Only fools are quoted.  --Anonymous~
~Only someone with nothing to be sorry for smiles back at the rear of an
elephant.~
~Only those who leisurely approach that which the masses are busy about
can be busy about that which the masses take leisurely.  --Lao Tsu~
~Oppernockity tunes but once.~
~Oreo~
~Our sires' age was worse that our grandsires'.  We their sons are
more worthless than they: so in our turn we shall give the world a
progeny yet more corrupt.  --Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~Our swords shall play the orators for us.  --Christopher Marlowe~
~Ours is a world where people don't know what they want and are willing
to go through hell to get it.~
~Overload -- core meltdown sequence initiated.~
~P-K4~
~PARKINSON'S LAW:  Work expands to fill the time available for
its completion.~
~PETER'S PRINCIPLE:  In every heirarchy, each employee tends to
rise to the level of his incompetence.~
~PUDDER'S LAW:  Anything that begins well will end badly.
(Note:  The converse of Pudder's law is not true.)~
~PURGE COMPLETE.~
~Patch griefs with proverbs.  --William Shakespeare  "Much Ado About Nothing"~
~Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.  --Titus Maccius Plautus~
~Pause for storage relocation.~
~Peanut Blossoms

1/2 cup sugar           2 tbsp. milk
1/2 cup brown sugar     1 tsp. vanilla
1/2 cup shortening      1 3/4 cups flour
1 egg                   1 tsp. soda
1/2 cup peanut butter   1/2 tsp. salt

Shape dough into balls. Roll in sugar and bake on ungreased
cookie sheet at 375 F. for 10-12 minutes.  Immediately top
each cookie with a Hershey's kiss or star pressing down firmly
to crack cookie.  Makes quite a few.~
~People who have no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking
advantage of them.~
~People who take cat naps don't usually sleep in a cat's cradle.~
~People will buy anything that's one to a customer.~
~Perfect guest: one who makes his host feel at home.~
~Phasors locked on target, Captain.~
~Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.~
~Practice yourself what you preach.  --Titus Maccius Plautus~
~Praise the sea; on shore remain.  --John Florio~
~Probably the meek really will inherit the earth;
they won't have the nerve to refuse.~
~Promptness is its own reward, if one lives by the clock instead of the
sword.~
~Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them.  --Publilius Syrus~
~Prototype designs always work.
		--Don Vonada~
~Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose petal down the
Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.~
~Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose petal down
the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.~
~Put not your trust in money, but put your money in trust.~
~Put your brain in gear before starting your mouth.~
~Put your trust in those who are worthy.~
~RUDIN'S LAW:  In a crisis that forces a choice to be made among
alternative courses of action, people tend to choose the worst
possible course.~
~RYAN'S LAW:  Make three correct guesses consecutively and you
will establish yourself as an expert.~
~Raising pet electric eels is gaining a lot of current popularity.~
~Reality is just a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.~
~Reality is just a crutch for people who can't handle science fiction.~
~Reality: what a concept!~
~Rebellion lay in his way, and he found it.
		--William Shakespeare  "Henry IV"~
~Remember to say hello to your bank teller.~
~Remembering is for those who have forgotten.  --Chinese proverb~
~Reputation:  what others are not thinking about you.~
~Research is to see what everybody else has seen, and think
what nobody else has thought.~
~Rest assured that your dog is finally getting enough cheese.~
~Riches cover a multitude of woes.  --Menander~
~Rome was not built in one day.  --John Heywood~
~Ruling a big country is like cooking a small fish.  --Lao Tsu~
~Russia has abolished God, but so far God has been
more tolerant.  --John Cameron Swayze~
~SATTINGLER'S LAW:  It works better if you plug it in.~
~SOL~
~Satire does not look pretty upon a tombstone.~
~Satire is what closes in New Haven.~
~Seeing that death, a necessary end,
Will come when it will come.  --William Shakespeare  "Julius Caesar"~
~Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow!
		--Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~Set the cart before the horse.  --John Heywood~
~She's learned to say things with her eyes that others waste time
putting into words.~
~Show your affection, which will probably meet with pleasant response.~
~Si jeunesse savait, si vieillesse pouvait [If youth but knew,
if old age but could].  --Henri Estienne~
~Sic transit gloria mundi [So passes away the glory of this world]
		--Thomas a Kempis~
~Sight is a faculty; seeing is an art.~
~Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle which fits them all.~
~Sir, it's very possible this asteroid is not stable.  --See Threepio~
~Small change can often be found under seat cushions.~
~Small things make base men proud.  --William Shakespeare  "Heney VI"~
~Smile!  You're on Candid Camera.~
~Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear
if you ignore them long enough.~
~So many men, so many opinions; every one his own way.
		--Publius Terentius Afer (Terence)~
~So you're back...~
~Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed, and some few
to be chewed and digested.  --Francis Bacon~
~Some men are discovered; others are found out.~
~Some peoples mouths work faster than their brains.
They say things they haven't even thought of yet.~
~Some rise by sin and some by virtue fall.~
~Some things have to be believed to be seen.~
~Someone is speaking well of you.
How unusual!~
~Someone is speaking well of you.~
~Someone is unenthusiastic about your work.~
~Someone whom you reject today, will reject you tomorrow.~
~Someone will try to honk your nose today.~
~Something's rotten in the state of Denmark.  --Shakespeare~
~Sorry.  Nice try.~
~Standing on head makes smile of frown, but rest of face also upside
down.~
~Statistics are no substitute for judgement.  --Henry Clay~
~Stop searching forever.  Happiness is just next to you.~
~Stop searching forever.  Happiness is unattainable.~
~Such evil deeds could religion prompt.  --Titus Lucretius Carus~
~Sunset: pronounced atmospheric scattering of shorter wavelengths,
resulting in selective transmission below 650 nanometers with
progressively reducing solar elevation.~
~Superstition, idolatry, and hypocrisy have ample wages, but truth
goes a-begging.  --Martin Luther~
~Swap read error.  You lose your mind.~
~Sweater: a garment worn by a child when his mother feels chilly.~
~Sweet April showers do spring May flowers.  --Thomas Tusser~
~System checkpoint complete.~
~System restarting, wait...~
~Systems programmers are the high priests of a low cult.
		--R.S. Barton~
~THE LAW OF THE PERVERSITY OF NATURE:  You cannot determine
beforehand which side of the bread to butter.~
~THE PROGRAMMERS' CHEER? -
SHIFT TO THE LEFT, SHIFT TO THE RIGHT!
POP UP, PUSH DOWN, BYTE, BYTE, BYTE!~
~THYME'S LAW:  Everything goes wrong at once.~
~Tact: the unsaid part of what you're thinking.~
~Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of
themselves.~
~Take what comfort there may be in owning a piece thereof.~
~Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.  --Euripides~
~Talkers are no good doers.  --William Shakespeare  "Henry VI"~
~Tallulah Bankhead barged down the Nile last night as Cleopatra
and sank.  --John Mason Brown, drama critic~
~Tempt not a desperate man.  --William Shakespeare  "Romeo and Juliet"~
~Thank you for observing all safety precautions.~
~That must be wonderful!  I don't understand it at all.~
~That's no moon...  --Obi-wan Kenobi~
~The Analytical Engine weaves Algebraical patterns just as the
Jacquard loom weaves flowers and leaves.
		--Ada Augusta, Countess of Lovelace -- the first programmer~
~The abuse of greatness is when it disjoins remorse from power.
		--William Shakespeare  "Julius Caesar"~
~The attacker must vanquish; the defender need only survive.~
~The average woman would rather have beauty than brains because the
average man can see better than he can think.~
~The best prophet of the future is the past.~
~The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.~
~The better part of valor is discretion.  --William Shakespeare  "Henry IV"~
~The cart has no place where a fifth wheel could be used.
		--Herbert von Fritzlar~
~The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out
a job application form.  --Stanley J. Randall~
~The coast was clear.  --Lope de Vega~
~The concept seems to be clear by now.  It has been defined several
times by examples of what it is not.~
~The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a
tedious book.~
~The descent to Hades is the same from every place.  --Anaxagoras~
~The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Merchant of Venice"~
~The die is cast.  --Gaius Julius Caesar~
~The difficult we do today; the impossible takes a little longer.~
~The disks are getting full; purge a file today.~
~The fashion wears out more apparel than the man.
		--William Shakespeare  "Much Ado About Nothing"~
~The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my
tongue.~
~The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.
		--William Shakespeare  "Henry VI"~
~The future is a myth created by insurance salesmen and high school
counselors.~
~The future lies ahead.~
~The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.~
~The greatest griefs are those we cause ourselves.  --Sophocles~
~The greatest remedy for anger is delay.~
~The hardest part of climbing the ladder of success is getting through
the crowd at the bottom.~
~The hardest thing is to disguise your feelings when you put a lot of
relatives on the train for home.~
~The heart is wiser than the intellect.~
~The human brain is a wonderful thing.  It starts working the
moment you are born, and never stops until you stand up to
speak in public.~
~The human race has one really effective weapon, and that
is laughter.  --Mark Twain~
~The idle mind knows not what it is it wants.  --Quintus Ennius~
~The last person who said that (God rest his soul) lived to regret it.~
~The last vestiges of the old Republic have been swept away.
		--Governor Tarkin~
~The life which is unexamined is not worth living.  --Plato~
~The light of a hundred stars does not equal the light of the moon.~
~The longer I am out of office, the more infallable I appear
to myself.  --Henry Kissinger~
~The longest part of the journey is said to be the passing of the
gate.  --Marcus Terentius Varro~
~The luck that is ordained for you will be coveted by others.~
~The man who has never been flogged has never been taught.  --Menander~
~The man who raises a fist has run out of ideas.
		--H. G. Wells in "Time After Time"~
~The man who runs may fight again.  --Menander~
~The man who understands one woman is qualified to understand
pretty well everything.  --Yeats~
~The minute a man is convinced that he is interesting, he isn't.~
~The moon is made of green cheese.  --John Heywood~
~The more laws and order are made prominent,
the more thieves and robbers there will be.  --Lao Tsu~
~The more the merrier.  --John Heywood~
~The most hopelessly stupid man is he who is not aware that he is wise.~
~The naked truth of it is, I have no shirt.
		--William Shakespeare  "Love's Labour's Lost"~
~The nearer to the church, the further from God.  --John Heywood~
~The only rose without thorns is friendship.~
~The only thing constant is change.~
~The people sensible enough to give good advice are usually
sensible enough to give none.~
~The plural of spouse is spice.~
~The problem with any unwritten law is that you don't know where to go
to erase it.		--Glaser and Way~
~The problem with any unwritten law is that you don't know where to go
to erase it.            --Glaser and Way~
~The proof of the pudding is in the eating.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one
persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.
Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
		--Bernard Shaw~
~The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one
persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.
Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
		--George Bernard Shaw~
~The rich get rich, and the poor get poorer.  The haves get more, the
have-nots die.~
~The ripest fruit falls first.  --William Shakespeare  "Richard II"~
~The road to Hades is easy to travel.  --Bion~
~The road to hell is paved with NAND gates.
		--J. Gooding~
~The shifts of Fortune test the reliability of friends.
		--Marcus Tullius Cicero~
~The smallest worm will turn being trodden on.
		--William Shakespeare  "Henry VI"~
~The star of riches is shining upon you.~
~The three laws of thermodynamics (revised):
  1) You can't win.
  2) You can't break even.
  3) You can't get out of the game.~
~The time is right to make new friends.~
~The truth about a woman often lasts longer than the woman is true.~
~The universe is all a spin-off of the Big Bang.~
~The universe is laughing behind your back.~
~The universe is ruled by letting things take their course.
It cannot be ruled by interfering.  --Chinese proverb~
~The very remembrance of my former misfortune proves a new one to
me.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.~
~The weed of crime bears bitter fruit.~
~The whole world is a tuxedo and you are a pair of brown shoes.
		--George Goebel~
~The wise man seeks everything in himself; the ignorant man tries
to get everything from somebody else.~
~The wise shepherd never trusts his flock to a smiling wolf.~
~The world really isn't any worse.  It's just that the news
coverage is so much better.~
~The world wants to be deceived.  --Sebastian Brant~
~There are few people more often in the wrong than those who cannot
endure to be thought so.~
~There are many people today who literally do not have a close personal
friend.~
~There are more old drunkards than old doctors.~
~There are more ways of killing a cat than choking her with cream.~
~There are no great men, only great challenges that ordinary men
are forced by circumstances to meet.  --Admiral William Halsey~
~There are some micro-organisms that exhibit characteristics of both
plants and animals.  When exposed to light they undergo photosynthesis;
and when the lights go out, they turn into animals.  But then, don't we
all.~
~There are three things I have always loved and never understood --
art, music, and women.~
~There is always someone worse off than yourself.~
~There is always something new out of Africa.  --Gaius Plinius Secundus~
~There is much Obi-Wan did not tell you.  --Darth Vadar~
~There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear.~
~There is no fool to the old fool.  --John Heywood~
~There is no grief which time does not lessen and soften.~
~There is no royal road to geometry.  --Euclid~
~There is no security on this earth.  There is only opportunity.
		--General Douglas MacArthur~
~There is nothing more silly than a silly laugh.  --Gaius Valerius Catullus~
~There is nothing so easy but that it becomes difficult when you do
it reluctantly.  --Publius Terentius Afer (Terence)~
~There is only one way to kill capitalism - by taxes, taxes, and
more taxes.  --Karl Marx~
~There isn't room enough in this dress for both of us!~
~There will be big changes for you but you will be happy.~
~There's at least one fool in every married couple.~
~There's small choice in rotten apples.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Taming of the Shrew"~
~There's so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me.~
~They are ill discoverers that think there is no land, when they
can see nothing but sea.  --Francis Bacon~
~They have been at a great feast of languages, and stolen the scraps.
		--William Shakespeare  "Love's Labour's Lost"~
~Things are not always what they seem.  --Phaedrus~
~Things past redress and now with me past care.
		--William Shakespeare  "Richard II"~
~Think twice before speaking. But don't say "think think click click".~
~This file will self-destruct in five minutes.~
~This is Betty Frenel.  I don't know who to call but I can't reach my
Food-a-holics partner.  I'm at Vido's on my second pizza with sausage
and mushroom.  Jim, come and get me!~
~This is Jim Rockford.
At the tone leave your name and message; I'll get back to you.~
~This is Maria, Liberty Bail Bonds.  Your client, Todd Lieman, skipped and
his bail is forfeit.  That's the pink slip on your '74 Firebird, I believe.
Sorry, Jim, bring it on over.~
~This is Marilyn Reed, I wanta talk to you...   Is this a machine?
I don't talk to machines!  [Click]~
~This is the Baron.  Angel Martin tells me you buy information.  Ok,
meet me at one a.m. behind the bus depot, bring five-hundred dollars
and come alone.  I'm serious!~
~This night methinks is but the daylight sick.
		--William Shakespeare  "The Merchant of Venice"~
~This system will self-destruct in five minutes.~
~This unit... must... survive.~
~This was the most unkindest cut of all.
		--William Shakespeare  "Julius Caesar"~
~Those of you who think you know everything are annoying those
of us who do.~
~Those who cannot remember the past are condemmed to repeat
it.  --George Santayana~
~Thou hast seen nothing yet.  --Miguel de Cervantes~
~Time as he grows old teaches all things.  --Aeschylus~
~Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.  --Theophrastus~
~To add insult to injury.  --Phaedrus~
~To be or not to be --Shakespeare
To do is to be --Nietzsche
To be is to do --Sartre
Do be do be do --Sinatra~
~To be wise, the only thing you really need to know is when
to say "I don't know."~
~To criticize the incompetent is easy; it is more difficult to criticize
the competent.~
~To do is to be --Nietzsche
To be is to do --Sartre
Do be do be do --Sinatra
Da do ron ron --Cassidy
Yabba dabba do --Flintstone~
~To do nothing is to be nothing.~
~To do two things at once is to do neither.  --Publilius Syrus~
~To find out a girl's faults, praise her to her
girl friends.  --Benjamin Franklin~
~To give happiness is to deserve happiness.~
~To have died once is enough.  --Publius Vergilius Maro (Virgil)~
~To iterate is human; to recurse, divine.
		--L. Peter Deutsch~
~To keep your friends treat them kindly; to kill them, treat them often.~
~To know Edina is to reject it.
		--Dudley Riggs, "The Year the Grinch Stole the Election"~
~To laugh at men of sense is the privilege of fools.~
~To love is good, love being difficult.~
~To refuse praise is to seek praise twice.~
~To save a single life is better than to build a seven story pagoda.~
~To see a need and wait to be asked, is to already refuse.~
~To the landlord belong the doorknobs.~
~To use violence is to already be defeated.  --Chinese proverb~
~Traveling through hyperspace isn't like dusting crops, boy.  --Han Solo~
~Treat your friend as if he might become an enemy.  --Publilius Syrus~
~True happiness will be found only in true love.~
~Truth is hard to find and harder to obscure.~
~Try to divide your time evenly to keep others happy.~
~Try to value useful qualities in one who loves you.~
~Two heads are better than one.  --John Heywood~
~Two rights don't make a wrong, they make an airplane.~
~UNNAMED LAW:  If it happens, it must be possible.~
~Under every stone lurks a politician.  --Aristophanes~
~Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no
birds sang there except those that sang best.  --Henry Van Dyke~
~Vini, vidi, vici [I came, I saw, I conquered].  --Gaius Julius Caesar~
~Violence is the last recourse of the incompetant.  --Heinlein~
~Virtue is not left to stand alone.  He who practices it will
have neighbors.  --Confucius~
~Visit beautiful Vergas Minnesota.~
~Visit beautiful Wisconsin Dells.~
~WEILER'S LAW:  Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't
have to do the work.~
~WHITEHEAD'S LAW:  The obvious answer is always overlooked.~
~WILCOX'S LAW:  A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from
a kick in the pants.~
~WOODWARD'S LAW:  A theory is better than its explanation.~
~Wait for that wisest of all counselors, Time.  --Pericles~
~Walk softly and carry a big stick.~
~War spares not the brave, but the cowardly.  --Anacreon~
~Waste not fresh tears over old griefs.  --Euripides~
~Watch your mouth, kid, or you'll find yourself floating home.
		--Han Solo~
~We all live in a state of ambitious poverty.  --Decimus Junius Juvenalis~
~We are not a clone.~
~We are not alone.~
~We cannot do everything at once, but we can do something
at once.  --Calvin Coolidge~
~We don't really understand it, so we'll give it to the programmers.~
~We prefer to speak evil of ourselves rather than not speak of
ourselves at all.~
~We promise according to our hopes, and perform according to our fears.~
~We rarely find anyone who can say he has lived a happy life, and
who, content with his life, can retire from the world like a
satisfied guest.  --Quintus Horatius Flaccus (Horace)~
~We read to say that we have read.~
~We secure our friends not by accepting favors but by doing them.
		--Thucydides~
~We the unwilling, led by the ungrateful, are doing the impossible.
We've done so much, for so long, with so little,
that we are now qualified to do something with nothing.~
~We'll pivot at warp 2 and bring all tubes to bear, Mr. Sulu!~
~Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.  --John Heywood~
~Well begun is half done.  --Aristotle~
~Well thaaaaaaat's okay.~
~Wharbat darbid yarbou sarbay?~
~What a friend we have in cheeses...~
~What an artist dies with me!  --Nero~
~What did you bring that book I didn't want to be read to out of
about Down Under up for?~
~What fools these mortals be.  --Lucius Annaeus Seneca~
~What is food to one, it to others bitter poison.  --Titus Lucretius Carus~
~What makes us so bitter against people who outwit us is that they think
themselves cleverer than we are.~
~What makes us so bitter against people who outwit us is that they
think themselves cleverer than we are.~
~What no spouse of a writer can ever understand is that a writer is
working when he's staring out the window.~
~What on earth would a man do with himself if something
did not stand in his way?  --H. G. Wells~
~What orators lack in depth they make up in length.~
~What passes for woman's intuition is often nothing more than man's
transparency.~
~What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?  --Le Guin~
~What soon grows old?  Gratitude.  --Aristotle~
~What this country needs is a dime that will buy a good five-cent bagel.~
~What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.  --Ann Landers~
~What's all this bru-ha-ha?~
~What's done to children, they will do to society.~
~What's so funny?~
~Whatever it is, I fear Greeks even when they bring gifts.
		--Publius Vergilius Maro (Virgil)~
~Whatever you want to do, you have to do something else first.~
~When God endowed human beings with brains, He did not intend to
guarantee them.~
~When I'm good, I'm great; but when I'm bad, I'm better.  --Mae West~
~When in doubt, follow your heart.~
~When nothing can possibly go wrong, it will.~
~When the blind lead the blind they will both fall over the
cliff.  --Chinese proverb~
~When the candles are out all women are fair.  --Plutarch~
~When the sun shineth, make hay.  --John Heywood~
~When you are at Rome live in the Roman style; when you are elsewhere
live as they live elsewhere.  --St. Ambrose~
~When you become used to never being alone, you may consider yourself
Americanized.~
~When you dig another out of trouble, you've got a place to
bury your own.~
~When you go out to buy, don't show your silver.~
~When you make your mark in the world, watch out for guys
with erasers.  --The Wall Street Journal~
~When you're in command, command.  --Admiral Nimitz~
~Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes.~
~Where the hell is Wall Drug?~
~Where there's a whip there's a way.~
~While there's life, there's hope.  --Publius Terentius Afer (Terence)~
~Who does not trust enough will not be trusted.  --Lao Tsu~
~Who goeth a-borrowing goeth a-sorrowing.  --Thomas Tusser~
~Who to himself is law no law doth need, offends no law, and is a
king indeed.  --George Chapman~
~Who's scruffy-looking?  --Han Solo~
~Why did the Lord give us so much quickness of movement unless it was to
avoid responsibility?~
~Why not go out on a limb?  Isn't that where the fruit is?~
~Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.
		--J. Winter Smith~
~Wishing without work is like fishing without bait.  --Frank Tyger~
~With clothes the new are best, with friends the old are best.~
~Without fools there would be no wisdom.~
~Women can keep a secret just as well as men, but it takes more
of them to do it.~
~Words are the voice of the heart.~
~Words have a longer life than deeds.  --Pindar~
~Words must be weighed, not counted.~
~Worth seeing?  Yes, but not worth going to see.~
~Would it help if I got out and pushed?  --Princess Leia Organa~
~Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?  --John Heywood~
~Yeast is yeast and nest is nest and never the mane shall tweet.~
~You are a bundle of energy always on the go.~
~You are always busy.~
~You are an insult to my intelligence!  I demand that you log off
immediately.~
~You are capable of planning your future.~
~You are confused; but this is your normal state.~
~You are deeply attached to your friends and acquaintances.~
~You are dishonest, but never to the point of hurting a friend.~
~You are fairminded, just and loving.~
~You are false data.~
~You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful
friend.~
~You are going to have a new love affair.~
~You are in a maze of little twisting passages, all different.~
~You are in a twisting maze of little passages, all different.~
~You are magnetic in your bearing.~
~You are not a fool just because you have done something foolish --
only if the folly of it escapes you.~
~You are scrupulously honest, frank, and straightforward.
Therefore you have few friends.~
~You are secretive in your dealings but never to the extent of trickery.~
~You are standing on my toes.~
~You are taking yourself too seriously.~
~You are tricky, but never to the point of dishonesty.~
~You ask what a nice girl will do?  She won't give an inch, but
she won't say no.  --Marcus Valerius Martialis~
~You can be replaced by this computer.~
~You can do very well in speculation where land or anything to do with
dirt is concerned.~
~You can lead a horse to water, but if you can get him to
float on his back, you've got something.~
~You can now buy more gates with less specifications than
at any other time in history.		--Kenneth Parker~
~You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose; but you
can't pick your friend's nose.~
~You can't change the laws of physics, Captain; I've got to have
thirty minutes!~
~You can't cheat the phone company.~
~You can't get there from here.~
~You can't kiss a girl unexpectedly - only sooner than
she thought you would.~
~You cannot kill time without injuring eternity.~
~You cannot propel youself forward by patting yourself on the back.~
~You cannot see the wood for the trees.  --John Heywood~
~You cannot use your friends and have them too.~
~You display the wonderful traits of charm and courtesy.~
~You don't have to be nice to people on the way up if you're not
planning on coming back down.  --Oliver Warbucks, "Annie"~
~You don't move to Edina, you achieve Edina.  --Guindon~
~You dream of things that aren't and ask "why not?".~
~You enjoy the company of other people.~
~You feel a whole lot more like you do now than you did when
you used to.~
~You get what you pay for.  --Gabriel Biel~
~You have a deep appreciation of the arts and music.~
~You have a massage (from the Swedish prime minister)~
~You have a reputation for being thoroughly reliable and trustworthy.
A pity that it's totally undeserved.~
~You have a strong appeal for members of the opposite sex.~
~You have a strong appeal for members of your own sex.~
~You have a strong desire for a home and your family interests come
first.~
~You have a truly strong individuality.~
~You have a will that can be influenced by all with whom you come in
contact.~
~You have all the characteristics of a popular politician: a
horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner.  --Aristophanes~
~You have an ability to sense and know higher truth.~
~You have an ambitious nature and may make a name for yourself.~
~You have an unusual equipment for success.  Be sure to use it properly.~
~You have an unusual understanding of the problems of human
relationship.~
~You have an unusual understanding of the problems of human
relationships.~
~You have been selected for a secret mission.~
~You have had a long-term stimulation relative to business.~
~You have literary talent that you should take pains to develop.~
~You have many friends and very few living enemies.~
~You have the power to influence all with whom you come in contact.~
~You humans are all alike.~
~You know how to win a victory, Hannibal, but not how to use it.
		--Maharbal~
~You like to form new friendships and make new acquaintances.~
~You love peace.~
~You love your home and want it to be beautiful.~
~You may my glories and my state dispose,
But not my griefs; still am I king of those.
		--William Shakespeare  "Richard II"~
~You need not worry about your future.~
~You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems.~
~You own a dog, but you can only feed a cat.~
~You plan things that you do not even attempt because of your extreme
caution.~
~You prefer the company of the opposite sex, but are well liked by your
own.~
~You recoil from the crude; you tend naturally toward the exquisite.~
~You roll my log, and I will roll yours.  --Lucius Annaeus Seneca~
~You seek to shield those you love and you like the role of the
provider.~
~You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.~
~You should avoid hedging, at least that's what I think.~
~You tread upon my patience.  --William Shakespeare  "Henry IV"~
~You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.~
~You will attract cultured and artistic people to your home.~
~You will be aided greatly by a person whom you thought to be
unimportant.~
~You will be audited by the Internal Revenue Service.~
~You will be awarded a medal for disregarding safety in saving someone.~
~You will be awarded some great honor.~
~You will be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize... posthumously.~
~You will be called upon to help a friend in trouble.~
~You will be dead within a year.~
~You will be divorced within a year.~
~You will be given a post of trust and responsibility.~
~You will be held hostage by a radical group.~
~You will be honored for contributing your time and skill to a worthy
cause.~
~You will be married within a year,
and divorced within two.~
~You will be married within a year.~
~You will be misunderstood by everyone.~
~You will be reincarnated as a toad; and you will be much happier.~
~You will be run over by a beer truck.~
~You will be run over by a bus.~
~You will be singled out for promotion in your work.~
~You will be successful in love.~
~You will be surprised by a loud noise.~
~You will be the last person to buy a Chrysler.~
~You will be the victim of a bizarre joke.~
~You will be traveling and coming into a fortune.~
~You will be winged by an anti-aircraft battery.~
~You will become rich and famous unless you don't.~
~You will contract a rare disease.~
~You will engage in a profitable business activity.~
~You will experience a strong urge to do good; but it will pass.~
~You will forget that you ever knew me.~
~You will gain money by a speculation or lottery.~
~You will gain money by an illegal action.~
~You will gain money by an immoral action.~
~You will get what you deserve.~
~You will give someone a piece of your mind,
which you can ill afford.~
~You will have a head crash on your private pack.~
~You will have a long and boring life.~
~You will have a long and unpleasant discussion with your supervisor.~
~You will have domestic happiness and faithful friends.~
~You will have good luck and overcome many hardships.~
~You will have long and healthy life.~
~You will have many recoverable tape errors.~
~You will hear good news from one you thought unfriendly to you.~
~You will inherit millions of dollars.~
~You will inherit some money or a small piece of land.~
~You will live to see your grandchildren.~
~You will lose an important disk file.~
~You will lose an important tape file.~
~You will meet an important person who will help you advance
professionally.~
~You will never know hunger.~
~You will not be elected to public office this year.~
~You will outgrow your usefullness.~
~You will overcome the attacks of jealous associates.~
~You will pass away very quickly.~
~You will pioneer the first Martian colony.~
~You will probably marry after a very brief courtship.~
~You will receive a legacy which will place you above want.~
~You will remember something that you should not have forgotten.~
~You will soon forget this.~
~You will soon meet a person who will play an important role in your
life.~
~You will step on the soil of many countries.~
~You will triumph over your enemy.~
~You will visit the Dung Pits of Glive soon.~
~You will win success in whatever calling you adopt.~
~You will wish you hadn't.~
~You would if you could but you can't so you won't.~
~You'll be sorry.....~
~You're a card which will have to be dealt with.~
~You're all clear now, kid.  Now blow this thing so we can all go
home.  --Han Solo~
~You're at Witt's End.~
~Young men think old men are fools; but old men know young men are
fools.  --George Chapman~
~Young men, hear an old man to whom old men hearkened when he was
young.  --Augustus Caesar~
~Your aim is high and to the right.~
~Your aims are high, and you are capable of much.~
~Your business will assume vast proportions.~
~Your depth of comprehension may tend to make you lax in worldly ways.~
~Your domestic life may be harmonious.~
~Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life.~
~Your heart is pure, and your mind clear, and your soul devout.~
~Your love life will be happy and harmonious.~
~Your love life will be... interesting.~
~Your lover will never wish to leave you.~
~Your mind understands what you have been taught;
your heart, what is true.~
~Your mode of life will be changed for the better because
of good news soon.~
~Your mode of life will be changed for the better because
of new developments.~
~Your mode of life will be changed for the better because of
good news soon.~
~Your mode of life will be changed to ASCII.~
~Your mode of life will be changed to EBCDIC.~
~Your nature demands love and your happiness depends on it.~
~Your own qualities will help prevent your advancement in the world.~
~Your present plans will be successful.~
~Your reasoning powers are good, and you are a fairly good planner.~
~Your society will be sought by people of taste and refinement.~
~Your society will be sought by people of taste and refinment.~
~Your step will soil many countries.~
~Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded.~
~Your temporary financial embarassment will be relieved
in a surprising manner.~
~Youth had been a habit of hers so long that she could not part with it.~
~Youth.  It's a wonder that anyone ever outgrows it.~
~[1] Alexander the Great was a great general.
[2] Great generals are forewarned.
[3] Forewarned is forearmed.
[4] Four is an even number.
[5] Four is certainly an odd number of arms for a man to have.
[6] The only number that is both even and odd is infinity.
	Therefor, Alexander the Great had an infinite number of arms.~
~[1] Alexander the Great was a great general.
[2] Great generals are forewarned.
[3] Forewarned is forearmed.
[4] Four is an even number.
[5] Four is certainly an odd number of arms for a man to have.
[6] The only number that is both even and odd is infinity.
	Therefor, all horses are black.~
~[Wisdom] is a tree of life to those laying hold of her, making happy
each one holding her fast.  --Proverbs 3:18 (NSV)~
~Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired
signifies in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not
fed, those who are cold and are not clothed.  This world in arms is not 
spending money alone.  It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the
genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children.  This is not
a way of life at all in any true sense.  Under the clouds of war, it 
is humanity hanging on a cross of iron.  
-Dwight Eisenhower  April 16,1953~
~BASIC is to computer programming as QWERTY is to typing - Seymour Papert~
